(As Reported to him by clients and colleagues over the years*)
- My dog ate the alarm clock during the night.
- I had a premonition that there is going to be a major earthquake today and our building is not safe.
- My car was commandeered by a SWAT team.
- My doctor told me not to wear any clothes until my rash is gone.
- I read the numbers wrong and thought I’d won the lottery, but I came in as soon as I realized my mistake.
- [No excuse was called in, but the employee was featured on “America’s Most Wanted” the night before.]
- My GPS malfunctioned as I was driving to the office.
- The idea of working today makes my stomach turn.
- My grandmother passed away. (Note: this was the employee’s ninth “grand-parent” who died over three years.)
- I had to rescue a cat from a tree in the rain and then change into dry clothes.
* Except for the excuse that I actually used one time. Can you guess which one?
Readers — I know you must have some good ones. Let’s hear them.
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