Over the years, I have put in my time on hiring committees and had the joy of reading through tall piles of cover letters. Most of the letters said the same thing in the same way. Just the stationery was different, and sometimes not even that.
Back to me. While most of the cover letters (whether mailed or e-mailed) were ordinary, a few displayed excellence and a few others. . . well, the others are just plain memorable.
Here in no particular order are the top ten things I’ll never forget that should have been left out of cover letters. Please oh please feel free to add to the list with your comments.
Top Cover Letter Goofs
- “None of the four terminations were my fault.”
- “If you check references, I can explain the convictions.”
- “I am not quite sure what you people do, but I know I can do it.”
- “Please do not include me in any preliminary rounds of interviews. I prefer to interview only in the final round.”
- “I will do anything for an interview. Anything.”
- “I assume that you will not be interested in interviewing me due to my gender. Would you please confirm in writing (notarized) that this is the reason for not interviewing me?”
- “I already feel a spiritual connection with your workplace.”
- “[Insert Recipient’s Name Here], I hope you will be impressed with my resume.”
- “Please do not invite me to an interview. I am just applying for unemployment purposes.”
- “Cats are my life.”