Dear Evil Skippy:
I work in a professional office environment (an accounting firm) and supervise fifteen people who work in customer service. Last weekend, I attended a bachelor’s party with some close friends. Part of the evening was spent at a strip club. I was shocked to see one of my employees working there as a cocktail waitress. She told me the next workday that she has worked there part time for a few months because she is saving money to buy a condo.
We do not have a rule against moonlighting, but we do have a rule that says employees must not do anything to damage the company’s reputation whether on or off duty. I am troubled by her off-duty activity and am concerned that some of our customers would disapprove. Do you think I would be out of line telling her she either has to give up the waitressing job if she wants to keep working here?
– Supervisor
Dear Supervisor:
I don’t know if you would be out of line, but you sure would be a double-standard-impaired dolt. You can’t condemn your employee for 
waitressing at the strip club when you were patronizing the same place. Give yourself the pink slip, bucko. You just earned a slap and that is the bare naked truth.
– Evil Skippy
P.S. You better have tipped well, or else you get another slap. I mean your waitress and anyone else who made you happy.
The likelihood of one of your clients complaining about the dignity of your office staff is practically zero. I say this because your employee has worked at the strip club for months without it becoming an issue and because the only way a customer would know about her other job is if they went to the club. It would be pretty dumb for them to complain under those circumstances – just like it is pretty dumb for you to judge your employee for working at a place you visited.
Readers – what do you think?
Evil Skippy and/or Jim are available to speak at your conferences and seminars! For information or to send a question for Evil Skippy to answer, contact us at:
You can find (and “like”) “Evil Skippy at Work” on Facebook and also follow ES on Twitter (@EvilSkippySays).
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Dear Evil Skippy:
I am writing because I am very upset about a so-called friend at work. I thought she liked and respected me. That changed this week. I went to a “makeover party” over the weekend and got a new hairstyle and also learned some new ways to do my make-up. I thought I looked great, but when I arrived at work on Monday, my “friend” made a weird face. She then motioned for me to follow her to the break room where she told me in no uncertain terms that she hated my look. She said it might work on a teenager but that it is not flattering to me. Now I wonder if she has been sabotaging me all along. Do you think I need to avoid this person?
– Still Steaming
Dear Still Steaming:
Life is full of disappointments and today I am disappointed because you did not send me a photo of your “new look”. I confess that I was hoping your friend was right so I could have a good laugh.
I don’t think your friend is evil (and believe me, I know evil). A truly evil person would have told you that you look great.
– Evil Skippy
ES is making assumptions. Maybe your friend is crazy and you really did look super. Maybe your friend is not very daring and others would have loved the “new you”. Maybe a million other things – but the main thing here is how did YOU feel about the new look. If you truly loved it, embrace it (as long as you conform to your employer’s dress code. No flashing, please).
Channel your inner adult and have a grown-up conversation with your colleague if this is bugging you. It would be silly to throw away a decent working relationship over one difference of opinion or misunderstanding.
At the same time, grab a dictionary and look up “sabotage”. According to a font of extensive knowledge (Wikipedia), “sabotage” is:
[A] deliberate action aimed at weakening another entity through subversion, obstruction, disruption, or destruction. In a workplace setting, sabotage is the conscious withdrawal of efficiency generally directed at causing some change in workplace conditions. One who engages in sabotage is a saboteur. As a rule, saboteurs try to conceal their identities because of the consequences of their actions.
Telling you to your face that she did not like your new hairstyle and make up is not sabotage. It might be mean and insulting, but she was not sabotaging you. It would have been more troublesome had she told everyone in the office except for you how she felt.
Readers – what do you think? Dump the friend?
Evil Skippy and/or Jim are available to speak at your conferences and seminars! For information or to send a question for Evil Skippy to answer, contact us at:
You can find (and “like”) “Evil Skippy at Work” on Facebook and also follow ES on Twitter (@EvilSkippySays).
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Dear Evil Skippy:
Can I refuse to hire an applicant with tattoos?
– Boss
Dear Boss:
Only if you do not want to hire hip and interesting people.
Personally, I would think twice before making people with tattoos mad by refusing to hire them. They know lots of rough folks who could do bad things to your car. Be careful.
– Evil Skippy
You want to hire the most qualified person for the job. That person may or may not have a tattoo. Sure, a particular tattoo might rule out a particular candidate. For example, I would not want to hire someone to work in food service who has a tattoo that says, “I love to spit in your food.” On the other hand, if the tattoo is not going to be a problem when it comes to customer service or other specific business factors, why do you care? Stop focusing on the ink and instead focus on how they think.
Readers – what do you think? Is it O.K. to base a hire decision on tattoos?
Evil Skippy and/or Jim are available to speak at your conferences and seminars! For information or to send a question for Evil Skippy to answer, contact us at:
You can find (and “like”) “Evil Skippy at Work” on Facebook and also follow ES on Twitter (@EvilSkippySays).
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I was recently reprimanded for being late to work too often. I am never too late, but admit that I could use a ten minute grace period on a lot of mornings. My boss is hardly ever on time. I think it is ridiculous for her to write me up when she does not follow the same rule. I am thinking about complaining to human resources about the double standard. Do you think H.R. is the best place to go, or would you recommend that I talk to her manager instead?
– Peeved
Dear Peeved:
What I recommend is that you start channeling your inner adult and leaving your inner child at home. You’ve been late. You’ve been warned. Take some responsibility, get to work on time and stop making excuses. In other words – grow up.
Be happy. I could have told you to implement one of your lame plans to talk to H.R. or upper management. That would have just emphasized to them that not only do you have an attendance problem, but you’re also a whiner.
– Evil Skippy
P.S. You might also stop making assumptions. Do you even know if your supervisor is “late”? She might have other projects or an arrangement with management that allows her different start times.
If your supervisor truly is failing to meet her attendance obligations, it’s not your job to reprimand her. Focus on yourself and let her manager do the reprimanding. You don’t have to be a tattle-tale, either. When she is late, just call her boss and ask if he or she knows how to reach her.
Evil Skippy and/or Jim are available to speak at your conferences and seminars! For information or to send a question for Evil Skippy to answer, contact us at:
You can find (and “like”) “Evil Skippy at Work” on Facebook and also follow ES on Twitter (@EvilSkippySays).
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Dear Evil Skippy:
I work in an office where we have flexible work schedules. I like to stay up late, so I also like starting my workday at 9:30. Several of my co-workers like to start work at 8:00. It drives me crazy that they won’t even give me a chance to turn on my computer before they start bombarding me with questions. I’ve told them to wait before coming at me, but they are too focused on their own agendas. How can I get them to understand that even though they are 90 minutes into their workday, I’m just warming up?
– Frustrated
Dear Frustrated:
It’s all about karma, baby. About five minutes before the end of their workday, go and bombard them with questions. Stand in the doorway so they can’t escape.
– Evil Skippy
This is one of those occasions that calls for “talk to the hand”. Hold up your hand, palm facing your oppressor(s). Say, “Not now. Give me time to settle in.” Then ignore them until you are settled. It will be awkward for a few times and you will have to be dedicated – but the lesson will be learned.
Evil Skippy and/or Jim are available to speak at your conferences and seminars! For information or to send a question for Evil Skippy to answer, contact us at:
You can find (and “like”) “Evil Skippy at Work” on Facebook and also follow ES on Twitter (@EvilSkippySays).
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Dear Evil Skippy:
One of my co-workers hovers. He will stop at my desk to ask a legitimate question, but then he doesn’t leave. He might not even say anything. He just stands there as if he is waiting for me to say something. I will often oblige with something like, “So, how is everything going?”, but it is awkward. How can I get him to leave?
– Trying Not To Be Rude
Dear Trying:
Mace.
– Evil Skippy
That works for me.
Or, you might just tell him to head back to his own desk because you have work to do. If he stays after that, just ignore him and go back to your crossword puzzles or whatever it is you usually do.
Evil Skippy and/or Jim are available to speak at your conferences and seminars! For information or to send a question for Evil Skippy to answer, contact us at:
You can find (and “like”) “Evil Skippy at Work” on Facebook and also follow ES on Twitter (@EvilSkippySays).
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Dear Evil Skippy:
Last December, my boss hosted a holiday party at his home. He and his wife invited the entire department. They also invited neighbors, family and friends. I met a young lady and we started dating. Neither of us wants to date anyone else and we are talking about the possibility of becoming engaged “some day”. Until now, we have not told our family members about the relationship. Here’s the problem – she is my boss’s daughter and we are afraid that he is going to be furious that this was kept secret from him. (I am 26 and my girlfriend is 24). I belong to a union and know he can’t fire me over this, but I am concerned that he will treat me bad in other ways. What can I do to keep my working relationship with him as good as it can be?
– Romeo
Dear Romeo:
Easy. Don’t tell him until after you elope. Once you’re married, he won’t do anything to jeopardize your job because that might force you to move in with him. If you can keep your marriage a secret until after a baby is on the way – all the better. Now that’s what I call family planning!
– Evil Skippy
Grow a backbone. The best way to maintain a good relationship with your boss is to be respectful and honest. Unless he is unreasonable, he is going to understand why his daughter and you did not say anything until now. I am not making this up – I am the father of two adult daughters and I sure don’t expect to hear about every guy they date. I just want to know about the serious ones.
You have nothing to apologize for. Pick a setting that works best to your advantage – such as telling your boss and his wife at the same time over dinner at a restaurant. In a public setting, he will have to act calm and rationale as he hears the news. That will give him time to think about the situation. If he does have initial feelings of betrayal over the “secret”, he should recover by the next work day (especially after his daughter can have a private chat with him later that evening and threaten to never speak to him again if he treats you differently at work).
Good luck to you both. Readers – do you have any more advice for Romeo?
Evil Skippy and/or Jim are available to speak at your conferences and seminars! For information or to send a question for Evil Skippy to answer, contact us at:
You can find (and “like”) “Evil Skippy at Work” on Facebook and also follow ES on Twitter (@EvilSkippySays).
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Dear Evil Skippy:
My supervisor conducts weekly staff meetings. These gatherings are more like a lecture than a meeting. He drones on and on without letting the rest of us say anything until the Q & A segment at the end. My problem is that he is boring and also has the kind of voice that puts me to sleep. I try to stay awake but often find myself nodding off. It is only a matter of time before I fall asleep and start snoring. Do you have tips for staying awake during a boring meeting?
– Groggy
Dear Groggy:
Don’t be so dense. The problem is not your wakefulness. The problem is that your boss is so dull. Instead of fighting to remain conscious, be proactive. Report him to a local Sleep Therapy Center. He will get the message when they start to send sleep-deprived clients to his meetings.
If that’s too direct, try one of my top ten tips for staying awake at meetings.
– Evil Skippy
Evil Skippy’s Top Ten Ways To Stay Awake At Meetings
- Take hot coffee to the meeting. It’s not to drink. Spill it in your lap when you feel woozy. Nothing wakes me up faster than piping hot liquid in my lap.
- Make your own Bingo cards. Replace the numbers with trite business phrases such as “24/7”, “think outside the box”, “deliverables”, “win-win” and “synergy”. Cross off a box whenever the phrase is mentioned (but you can’t cross it off if you said it yourself – that’s cheating even by my evil standards). Keeping track of your phrases will keep you awake and it is even more stimulating when someone yells “Bingo!”
Wear fake glasses with realistic eyes painted on the lenses. If you happen to fall asleep, it will still look as though you are wide awake.- Count the number of times your boss says “ummmm”. Save the scores to enjoy the excitement of wondering if this will be the meeting when a new record will be set.
- Use the buddy system. If you start to nod off, your buddy will kick you. If your buddy starts to nod off (or says something stupid), you do the kicking. This is great because not only do you stay awake – you get to kick people! (This is not a good method if you are not sitting at a table or if the table top is see-through glass).
- Nibble on your finger to induce a little pain. Better yet, have a co-worker nibble so you can’t go easy on yourself.
- Invent a smart phone app that detects when you start to fall asleep and delivers a rousing shock, then use it. Share any profits with me since I thought of it.
- Doodle. On your boss’s forehead.
- Get up and move around. To Starbucks, perhaps.
- Read Evil Skippy at Work. Add comments. Share with friends.
Better yet, endorse my plea to Murder the Meeting – as described here and here and here.
Evil Skippy and/or Jim are available to speak at your conferences and seminars! For information or to send a question for Evil Skippy to answer, contact us at:
You can find (and “like”) “Evil Skippy at Work” on Facebook and also follow ES on Twitter (@EvilSkippySays).
Comments? Click the bubble below.
I am not quite sure how it happened, but I started dating my supervisor. There is a policy at our company that prohibits dating between supervisors and subordinates. For that reason and also because his divorce is not final, my supervisor/boyfriend says we have to keep our relationship a secret. We are careful not to be seen together in public. We meet for dinner at my place, watch movies and have quality time without going out. We are hoping that I will be able to transfer to another department in September, when my probation period is over. In the meantime, if for some reason our relationship is discovered, would my job be in jeopardy? I am pretty sure the policy only applies to the supervisor but don’t want to ask anyone here because it would make them suspicious.
– In Love But Needs Job
Dear “In Love”:
I’ve got news for you. You are not dating. You are having booty calls. Dates require going out in public from time to time.
Find some self-esteem and find someone to date who isn’t a selfish jerk.
– Evil Skippy
P.S. A big slap to your “boyfriend” for jeopardizing his job and yours. A big slap to you if you do not dump the guy. You can do better. Anyone could.
I’ve got more news for you. You know what you are doing violates the workplace rules. You know at a minimum that your supervisor is breaking the rule. You are “helping” him do so despite knowing the rule. For all these reasons, you are a prime candidate for discipline if you are discovered (second only to your supervisor). (If he is pressuring you or making you fear for your job, he is probably also engaging in sexual harassment. He is not your dream date — he is a nightmare).
Evil Skippy and/or Jim are available to speak at your conferences and seminars! For information or to send a question for Evil Skippy to answer, contact us at:
You can find (and “like”) “Evil Skippy at Work” on Facebook and also follow ES on Twitter (@EvilSkippySays).
Comments? Click the bubble below.
Dear Evil Skippy:
One of the employees who I supervise is a perfectionist. I do not use that term lightly. I’ve come to believe she has a personality disorder. She can’t let go of her work easily because she is always certain she can make it better. The problems are that her projects are often late and she frequently bogs others down with needless discussions about unimportant details. Do you have any ideas about how I can remedy this?
– Bill
Dear Bill:
You can remedy the problem by referring to a dictionary. An employee who is not getting her work done on time is not “perfect”. Duh.
You’re a supervisor. So supervise. Tell her to get her work done on time or you’ll kick her into Discipline Land.
– Evil Skippy
Do you have any idea how many other supervisors are reading this and hating you for complaining about an employee who is trying to be perfect when they are stuck with losers who don’t care about their work? Look on the bright side. If you are going to have an employee with a personality disorder, it’s better for you as a supervisor to have someone with perfectionism OCD than severe paranoia, anger control issues or any disorder common to serial killers.
Nonetheless, it is clear you have a problem that needs to be fixed. It is not rocket science. Recognize your employee’s strength and then clearly set your expectation. Like this:
“I admire your attention to detail. It is an important part of your job and you excel at it. It’s also important that projects be completed in a timely manner and you have not been succeeding at that part. Missed deadlines are as bad as missed errors. You need to focus on the timelines and you need to start improving about that aspect right away. Do you have any ideas about how I can support you with this? I prefer not to make this a corrective action or discipline matter but will have to go that route if your work is not on time.”
If she truly is an obsessed perfectionist, she will realize that she is not perfect until she is on time. If she is not truly obsessed, she will now be on notice that if she does not get her work on time, you will take stronger action. You win either way.
Readers – what would you do about an out-of-control perfectionist?
Evil Skippy and/or Jim are available to speak at your conferences and seminars! For information or to send a question for Evil Skippy to answer, contact us at:
You can find (and “like”) “Evil Skippy at Work” on Facebook and also follow ES on Twitter (@EvilSkippySays).
Comments? Click the bubble below.
